Ok, so I know that I cheated because I started back to work after Labour day, so it was a short week of only 4 days, but I still survived! The first day back was hilarious. I was still in slow motion and I think I left my brain at home. I had had an OT clipboard with all of my documentation and some reference books, pens and a lock for my locker. However, since Cubby came one month early and I delivered at the hospital I work at, I had come to my locker before I was discharged home and dumped everything into a plastic bag, including my lock and ID badge. I had been unable to locate that plastic bag. So I went through my day borrowing pens and using a laniard around my neck with no ID badge. It took me all morning to get my computer passwords organized and luckily for me I was shadowing the OT who was covering for me so she eased me into it. It’s amazing what you can forget in 15 months! I think that I had even forgotten how to write. For 15 months, the only thing that I have been writing is a short grocery list and maybe “to do” lists. I have not been charting and writing up OT assessments. I felt like my hand didn’t even work. LOL!
My job had changed somewhat since I was last at the hospital. One of the units that I cover had moved into the new building so I went over there to orient myself (it was beautiful!). I also was now covering a separate pre-admission clinic, so I was frantically writing down the process and orienting myself to that unit. And there were new faces and old faces who had moved on to different jobs. Lots of changes! It was good to see the familiar faces and catch up with them. Of course everyone was asking me how my Cubby was doing and if I had any pictures of her. I can’t believe that I haven’t printed out any pictures. I have about 2000 on my computer! I did have a recent picture on my cellphone so I ended up carrying that around with me to show people.
Throughout the day, I was looking at the clock wondering what Cubby would be up to and daydreaming about what I would be doing with her if I was still at home. At 9 am, I was thinking: “We would be watching Live with Kelly right now”. And I was so upset, I had been waiting to see who her new co-host was. At 10 am, I was thinking: “Cubby would be getting tired now and would be wanting her first nap, I hope she is sleeping.” At lunch, I glanced at the time and thought about what she would be eating. I also took the time to proactively join the gym. I’m hoping that I can go at lunch time, since I am not waking up at 4:30 am to work out and I definitely don’t have the energy at 8 or 9 pm when I put her to sleep.
It was a difficult, but fast paced first day back. I was sad as I missed my little Cubby, but I had comfort in knowing that she was well taken care of by my family. That was one good thing that I didn’t have to stress about. I knew that she would be well fed and looked after at my mom’s place and mother-in-law’s house. I called my mom at lunch and she told me that Cubby was perfectly fine all day. She had eaten all of her snacks and lunch and had taken 1 nap. She was playing happily and was no trouble at all. I felt better knowing that Cubby was completely content, even though I was secretly upset that she was not missing me. I was missing her like crazy!
As the week went on, it got easier. Lucky for me that work was pretty busy, so the days were going by so fast. I didn’t really have time to sit and think about what Cubby was up to. My days seem really long and tiring now as I go to work and then drive to pick up Cubby from either my mom’s house or my mother-in-law’s house and I don’t get home until 5:30 or 6 pm. By the time I feed her dinner and play with her and put her to sleep, it is 9 pm. And then I have an hour or two to myself, however it is spent getting ready for the next day and making my lunch. Having Cubby has changed the daily routine! There is no more time for lazying around and watching my favourite shows or lounging and reading a book. I guess I will get into the swing of things and establish more of a routine. The best part is leaving work and driving to pick up Cubby and seeing the huge smile on her face and giving her a big hug and kiss! Those moments are priceless.